Zoe pronounced Zowee
I have a buddy called Ken who lives next door. He is a bit simple but very endearing. We go for walks every day, sometimes twice a day - once in the morning and once early evening.
Now Ken is quite short for his species - only 5ft in his shoes but he likes to pretend he is boss. I let him think that because he is harmless really. (Anyone just looking at us together would know who was really boss).
The thing is we have this sort of routine - I suppose you could call it a habit really. He tugs on this lead and I sit down, he tries to drag me and I lay right down. Then he gets out these delicious treats (well he thinks I think they are delicious and they are 'alright' I suppose if I'm peckish). I sit up he gives me one, I stand up he gives me a couple, go a couple of paces and I get a couple more. When they stop coming I lie down again.
Now this charade goes on and on - sometimes for 15 minutes. Usually with an amused audience.
When I get tired of it I get up and trot along with Ken. This always brings a round of applause from our audience.
Ken thinks he's mastered me.......and I let him. After all we all need a bit of encouragement dont we?
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posted by June at 10:00 AM | Leave Comment [0] | # Link to this entry
Reflections on a winning day
When I lie in bed, just before I dose, I reflect on the day and judge it by how many of these treats I have managed to wheedle. Yesterday, for instance, was a winner!
Our neighbour, Mack, had visitors - relations I think. We had them over for a bbq and they brought over two young boys who were keen footballers. I loaned them my ball and we kicked and chased happily, up and down the yard. It wasnt long before the oldies joined in, and in their intoxicated enthusiasm, the webber bbq was kicked right over - hot coals, sausages and burgers and all.
Naturally I rushed to help clear up the mess in a desperate and percipient attempt to stop the inevitable.
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posted by June at 10:00 AM | Leave Comment [1] | # Link to this entry
Excerpts from a Dogs Diary
My pack are very pleased with me. They feed me well and take me out for walks.
I sleep on the bed of my best friend.
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posted by June at 10:00 AM | Leave Comment [0] | # Link to this entry
Excerpts from a Cat's Diary
Excerpts from a Cat's Diary
Day 983 of my captivity.
My captors continue to taunt me with bizarre little dangling objects.
They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while the other inmates and I are fed
hash or some sort of dry nuggets. Although I make my contempt for the
rations perfectly clear, I nevertheless must eat something in order to
keep up my strength. The only thing that keeps me going is my dream of
escape. In an attempt to disgust them, I once again vomit on the carpet.
Today I decapitated a mouse and dropped its headless body at their feet.
I had hoped this would strike fear into their hearts, since it clearly
demonstrates what I am capable of. However, they merely made
condescending comments about what a "good little hunter" I am.
B#st#rds!
There was some sort of assembly of their accomplices tonight. I was
placed in solitary confinement for the duration of the event. However, I
could hear the noises and smell the food. I overheard that my
confinement was due to the power of "allergies." I must learn what this
means, and how to use it to my advantage.
Today I was almost successful in an attempt to assassinate one of my
tormentors by weaving around his feet as he was walking. I must try this
again tomorrow -- but at the top of the stairs.
I am convinced that the other prisoners here are flunkies and snitches.
The dog receives special privileges. He is regularly released - and
seems to be more than willing to return. He is obviously demented. The
bird has got to be an informant. I observe him communicate with the
guards regularly. I am certain that he reports my every move. My captors
have arranged protective custody for him in an elevated cell, so he is
safe. For now.
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